Satire:EVMs have always sleepless nights days before any elections and funily this Delhi election 2020 was no different to EVM fraternity.
Despite all the awkwardly hard touches,oogling by the civilized,patriotic Indians;EVMs have never complained and shied away from the national duty .But Modi government initiative to use its resources in a multi-purpose way has made EVMs unhappy .
They have already heard thrillers out of mocktails of bankers,jan dhan accounts,insurance policy,on duty deaths.
As per home ministry press note, EVMs are now expected to deliver power transmission to a different planet. Home Minister Amit shah is told to be a meticulous hard worker.
Election commission has substantiated it by his good grades in social engineering degree from the universities of state and national elections.
Shah’s chanakya mind is always in precise lookout for using patented in house Chronology technology to set things straight.
He used this consistent,never failing technique on EVM fraternity and informed them “First you will supply electricity. After electricity ,you will count vote.We are not going to go back an inch. Chronology samjhiye”
He went on to explain to a group of EVMs saying “Please note electrification of entire India is already completed in 2018.
We are the chosen ones to patent and use EVM technology to transmit electricity to a different planet.
The first beneficiary from this current transission technology will be Shaheen Bagh region of Mars. Since it is inhouse project, lot depends on you guys for India’s reputation.
Your ability to take huge emotional and physical pressure led ISRO and Power Ministry to recommend your names for this job”
Amit Shah further explained “Since it’s going to be a technology of future and a guiding light to universe, Deshbhakt citizens are dying to attain immortality by playing their role.
They will shout out loud ‘HEY MOGAMBO’at mach 3 while pressing hard on your buttons during Delhi Elections 2020.
You need to sustain such extreme nationalist emotional and physical pain for the sake of motherland.
Your replying back by “KHUSH HUA” is quintessential to complete the transmission circuit. These two super codes of Hey Mogambo and khush hua are DNA for electrons to attain escape velocity to reach Shaheen bagh.”
Amit shah sensing EVMs discomfort in understanding of this complex technology said in a simpler line “please shout back khush hua when you hear hey mogambo”
EVMs are panicked after this ET adventure apart from duties of elections as mentioned in their SOPs.
In panick they have counted delhi elections 2025 votes as well and declared Kejriwal to be a winner in 2025 with 52 seats.
This has led Social scientists to conclude that EVMs will be good for democratic election process instead of electriification drive of cosmos.